Betrayal trauma

Disbelief, shock, confusion, anxiety, depression, anger, shame. You may literally feel like you are going “crazy” or that you are on an emotional rollercoaster. Discovering that your partner, the one who was supposed to be your “person”, has been hiding and lying to you is incredibly heart-breaking, earth-shattering and painful. Not to mention how incredibly lonely it can feel, not knowing who you can trust to share what you are going through and how you’re truly doing.
“You are not alone and this betrayal doesn’t have to rule your life. There is support and guidance available to you.”

You might be questioning your reality, obsessing about what really happened and what didn’t, or beating yourself up for not “catching it” sooner. You may be struggling with intrusive thoughts about your partner’s acting out or re-living the moment of discovery. You may be overwhelmed with rage one moment and blaming yourself the next. You may find yourself craving a connection with your partner one moment and wanting absolutely nothing to do with them the next. It’s also very common for old traumas, abandonments and betrayals to surface, only adding to your pain of discovery. Or perhaps you’re completely numb and avoiding it, trying to pretend like it doesn’t exist, because the pain feels too great to face.

Betrayal trauma occurs when someone is betrayed or deceived by someone they relied on and trusted. Research suggests that partners of sex addicts experience symptoms of PTSD. This pain and trauma is very real and can unfortunately often be overshadowed by the partner’s newly discovered addiction. You are not alone in this pain and confusion. There is a community of people out there doing the work to heal their betrayal trauma. We are honored to share that we have a therapist on staff that has received specialized training by the Institute of Trauma and Addiction Professionals, a leading organization in the treatment of sex addiction and betrayal trauma.

Symptoms of betrayal trauma:

9
Feelings of anxiety, panic, hyper vigilance and paranoia.
9
Distrust of yourself and others
9
Low self-worth, feelings of inadequacy, shame, feeling unlovable or at fault.
9
Disturbances with sleep and eating
9
Feelings of rage and anger
9
Avoidance of physical touch
9
Intrusive thoughts, obsessing about the partner’s whereabouts, acting out history, searching for evidence, etc.
9
Being in “survival mode”, feeling numb or disconnected from yourself and your body.

How Therapy Can Help

Betrayal trauma therapy can help you:
9
Understand your own story
9
Regulate your nervous system and manage symptoms of PTSD
9
Build trust within yourself again
9
Work through any old traumas that the betrayal may be bringing up
9
Identify and develop boundaries
9
Work through difficult feelings in healthy ways
9
Build healthy self-esteem and self-worth
9
Work through shame
9
Develop a plan for recovery
9
Take really good care of yourself throughout this process
9
Feel heard, seen and supported through the course of your recovery
We will support you in working through your pain, anger, grief and whatever other emotions you’re experiencing in a way that feels healthy and productive to you. We will support you in exploring, identifying and setting the boundaries necessary to keep yourself safe. We work with you on building your own recovery and finding peace and safety, even during this very incredibly difficult time. We offer the space to explore how your own upbringing may be contributing to some symptoms you’re experiencing in the present. We also offer specialized treatments in the resolution of trauma, such as hypnotherapy, EMDR and Pia Mellody’s model. These modalities specifically for the resolution trauma can help you find relief in your body and in your mind.
Real Healing Counseling offers you a space that is nonjudgmental and safe to process your pain and tell your story.